"I waited patiently for the LORD; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. " Psalm 40:1-3a
As I write this, Wyatt lies next to me in his bouncer. He kicks his feet and waves his arms. He sings his own song - full of coos and ahhs. he doesn't yet know the God to which his praises rise. He doesn't yet know the God who formed the tiny fingers that Wyatt has just discovered. He doesn't know how close he came to loosing his perfect little mind and body nor the God who lifted him free of my womb, and free from danger.
But he will. I will tell him the story of his beginning. A story of a placenta gone bad - full of danger and drama. But with such a happy ending. That happy ending is just the beginning of his life. What he does with his life, what God has planned for his life, well now that is a story that I will have to wait for Wyatt to write.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Monday, February 8, 2010
First Laptop Post
This is the first blog using my birthday present - a laptop. Thank you Jeffrey for your generous gift to me.
Now that I have my own computer, I plan on blogging a lot more often. So I want to start this new phase of blogging with a quick sketch of my kids right now.
Wyatt is 4 months old. He is 14 lbs, 24.5 inches, and is now in the 25%. He smiling, cooing, giggling, and just starting to reach for things. I think that he is my reward for a rough pregnancy and first couple months of infancy. He loves to snuggle with me and watch our family play around him. Often times he joins us for our family meals by acting as our center piece. He has his tummy time on a blanket in the middle of the table where he can see us, and we can adore him.
Zion is 2.5 years old. He is everything a 2 year old ought to be. Cute, fun, and challenging. He is very independent and often exclaims, "me do it!" He has a fun way of phrasing things when he does want our help. Some of my favorites are, "please have some do it," "please have some want it," and "please have some fix it." He is potty training right now. This mostly involves running half naked around the house. His accidents are few, so I think we are making progress. He is a very cuddly little boy. Throughout my day, I hear requests like, "hold me," "want to sit," and "want to pick you up." Zion is getting more helpful everyday. He can put his dirty laundry away, throw away his diapers, help clean up and help me empty the dishwasher.
Elise is 4 years old. I think that 4 years old is a delightful age. She getting more and more independent. She can dress herself, put her clean clothes away, set the table, clean up, get snacks out, and fetch things for me. She continues to be creative in her play and stories. She loves to read her "big books" - the Little House series, the American Girl Kit books, and a book of Disney stories. Daily I am showered with her verbal praise and affection. It seems that if she can't think of anything else to say, she fills the silence with "I love you!" or other more specific praise like, "you do something nice for us everyday" or "you are such a nice mommy" or "our house really does look pretty - you decorate it so nice" or "we will never run out of towels because you are so smart to wash them when they get dirty." I could go on and on. She is also known to gather praise for herself, "I am such a sweet, sweet little girl" or "aren't you glad you have three great kids?" or "am I the best kid?" or "I am such a good helper".
I am quite busy taking care of them all. But after almost a year of not being allowed to lift them or work hard and my few months of hospitalization, I am eager and grateful to care for my family.
My smiley little guy
Elise and Zion enjoying the snow
My "Readie Pie"
My boys
I drew an "I (heart) You" in the snow. Elise then crawled inside and exclaimed, "I'm in your heart!"
Now that I have my own computer, I plan on blogging a lot more often. So I want to start this new phase of blogging with a quick sketch of my kids right now.
Wyatt is 4 months old. He is 14 lbs, 24.5 inches, and is now in the 25%. He smiling, cooing, giggling, and just starting to reach for things. I think that he is my reward for a rough pregnancy and first couple months of infancy. He loves to snuggle with me and watch our family play around him. Often times he joins us for our family meals by acting as our center piece. He has his tummy time on a blanket in the middle of the table where he can see us, and we can adore him.
Zion is 2.5 years old. He is everything a 2 year old ought to be. Cute, fun, and challenging. He is very independent and often exclaims, "me do it!" He has a fun way of phrasing things when he does want our help. Some of my favorites are, "please have some do it," "please have some want it," and "please have some fix it." He is potty training right now. This mostly involves running half naked around the house. His accidents are few, so I think we are making progress. He is a very cuddly little boy. Throughout my day, I hear requests like, "hold me," "want to sit," and "want to pick you up." Zion is getting more helpful everyday. He can put his dirty laundry away, throw away his diapers, help clean up and help me empty the dishwasher.
Elise is 4 years old. I think that 4 years old is a delightful age. She getting more and more independent. She can dress herself, put her clean clothes away, set the table, clean up, get snacks out, and fetch things for me. She continues to be creative in her play and stories. She loves to read her "big books" - the Little House series, the American Girl Kit books, and a book of Disney stories. Daily I am showered with her verbal praise and affection. It seems that if she can't think of anything else to say, she fills the silence with "I love you!" or other more specific praise like, "you do something nice for us everyday" or "you are such a nice mommy" or "our house really does look pretty - you decorate it so nice" or "we will never run out of towels because you are so smart to wash them when they get dirty." I could go on and on. She is also known to gather praise for herself, "I am such a sweet, sweet little girl" or "aren't you glad you have three great kids?" or "am I the best kid?" or "I am such a good helper".
I am quite busy taking care of them all. But after almost a year of not being allowed to lift them or work hard and my few months of hospitalization, I am eager and grateful to care for my family.
My smiley little guy
Elise and Zion enjoying the snow
My "Readie Pie"
My boys
I drew an "I (heart) You" in the snow. Elise then crawled inside and exclaimed, "I'm in your heart!"Friday, February 5, 2010
31
Today I am 31 years old. Today Wyatt is 4 months old. It was 1 year ago today that Wyatt's life first began. A year ago, I was planning for #3, but didn't yet know that I was pregnant. I had "Big Sister" and "Big Brother" shirts sitting in the closet, just waiting for my 3rd positive pregnancy test, and my 3rd chance to share the happy news with Jeffrey.
A year ago I still thought I was crucial to my kids. I thought they would melt into confusion and sorrow if I was gone. A year ago I didn't know know resilient they are.
A year ago I knew that our family the most important thing in Jeffrey's life - in theory. I had never tested his loyalty to me over his education and job responsibilities. Now I know that Jeffrey will drop what he needs to catch his falling family.
A year ago I thought that Jeffrey needed my instructions, insight and prodding regarding our children. Now I know that he can handle outings, cranky kids, missed naps, messy meals, potty training accidents, and whatever else ours kids throw his way. He has a relationship with them outside of me. His love for them doesn't need any molding on my part.
A year ago I didn't know that friends and family would shelve their responsibilities to take up mine. I could have guessed the names of those would come and care for my kids. But I didn't yet know of the friends that would rally to send care packages, cards, phone calls, and e-mails. And I didn't know just how much that would mean to me.
A year ago I didn't know that the child growing in me would be our grand finale. Full of danger, excitement, joy, and finality. A year ago I still had plans for #4. We still had conversations about how far apart we would want the next one's to be spaced. I had baby girl clothes pack in boxes in the garage, full of the possibility of being used again. A year ago I didn't know this was the last months that I would ever count the days until I could take a pregnancy test, the last month filled with possibility.
A year ago I felt burdened by motherhood. I longed for a break. I was tired and didn't see any end in site. Now I have trouble expressing just how grateful I am to be the one to fix my kids dinners, comfort their cries, shape their characters, and join in their adventure of childhood. I'm so glad that I have the strength to pick up Zion and give piggy back rides to Elise. And knowing that Wyatt is our last makes me realize that this phase will not last forever. We will only live our lives to the rhythm of diaper changes and nap times for a few more years.
A year ago I didn't startle with fear at each twinge that feels like the beginning of a bleed. But then again, I also didn't know the joy and relief I feel each time I quickly realize that I am safe. I didn't appreciate the simple little word - safe.
A year ago I still thought I was crucial to my kids. I thought they would melt into confusion and sorrow if I was gone. A year ago I didn't know know resilient they are.
A year ago I knew that our family the most important thing in Jeffrey's life - in theory. I had never tested his loyalty to me over his education and job responsibilities. Now I know that Jeffrey will drop what he needs to catch his falling family.
A year ago I thought that Jeffrey needed my instructions, insight and prodding regarding our children. Now I know that he can handle outings, cranky kids, missed naps, messy meals, potty training accidents, and whatever else ours kids throw his way. He has a relationship with them outside of me. His love for them doesn't need any molding on my part.
A year ago I didn't know that friends and family would shelve their responsibilities to take up mine. I could have guessed the names of those would come and care for my kids. But I didn't yet know of the friends that would rally to send care packages, cards, phone calls, and e-mails. And I didn't know just how much that would mean to me.
A year ago I didn't know that the child growing in me would be our grand finale. Full of danger, excitement, joy, and finality. A year ago I still had plans for #4. We still had conversations about how far apart we would want the next one's to be spaced. I had baby girl clothes pack in boxes in the garage, full of the possibility of being used again. A year ago I didn't know this was the last months that I would ever count the days until I could take a pregnancy test, the last month filled with possibility.
A year ago I felt burdened by motherhood. I longed for a break. I was tired and didn't see any end in site. Now I have trouble expressing just how grateful I am to be the one to fix my kids dinners, comfort their cries, shape their characters, and join in their adventure of childhood. I'm so glad that I have the strength to pick up Zion and give piggy back rides to Elise. And knowing that Wyatt is our last makes me realize that this phase will not last forever. We will only live our lives to the rhythm of diaper changes and nap times for a few more years.
A year ago I didn't startle with fear at each twinge that feels like the beginning of a bleed. But then again, I also didn't know the joy and relief I feel each time I quickly realize that I am safe. I didn't appreciate the simple little word - safe.
A year ago I was worry. Worried about how we were going to handle our home sale, a move, and possibly a pregnancy. Now we are again facing a move - this time with another baby under my care. But I'm not worried now. Now I know how much we can handle.
So much has changed over the past year. The picture of our family isn't any different than I would have anticipated a year ago. Most of the changes are internal. But we are changed. I still look around at my "normal" life and shake my head in wonder. This morning I was greeted by pajama clad children eager to wish me a happy birthday, a kiss from my husband, and the sweet nursings of my baby. I am still amazed that this wonderful life is once again mine.
So much has changed over the past year. The picture of our family isn't any different than I would have anticipated a year ago. Most of the changes are internal. But we are changed. I still look around at my "normal" life and shake my head in wonder. This morning I was greeted by pajama clad children eager to wish me a happy birthday, a kiss from my husband, and the sweet nursings of my baby. I am still amazed that this wonderful life is once again mine.
Elise's gift to me - pink silk flowers bought with her own money.
Friday, January 29, 2010
Wyatt
All about Wyatt.
Wyatt is almost 4 months old now. For the first 2.5 months, he ate every 2 to 2.5 hours. Then over the course of just a few weeks he dropped down to waking me up only once between 10 pm and 8 am. Yahoo!
Wyatt is a smiley little guy. He particularly likes my smiles, my silly dances, and his siblings.
Wyatt loves me. He saves his biggest smiles for me and looks at my face out of a group of admirers. He doesn't have much control of his arms yet, but he will lean is head toward me to try and get out of another person's arms and into mine.
He recently graduated to size 3-6 month clothing and size 2 diapers. I won't know how much he weighs until his next appointment with the pediatrician.
Wyatt is trying to laugh. It comes out as a funny little gasp, but it is a start.
Wyatt is beginning to explore the world with his mouth. In particular, he gums his hands and my shirt.
Wyatt resists naptime, but rarely cries when he awakens from his sleep. Instead he smiles at his turtle quilt that hangs be his crib.
Wyatt is a special part of our family and life wouldn't be complete without him.
Friday, January 22, 2010
A Boasting Posting
The title should be a warning, if you are not a doting grandparent, aunt, or uncle - you may want to skip this posting.
I just have to glow a bit about my little reader, Elise. At 4 years old, she continues to amaze and startle us with her ability. During this last vacation to Portland, Grammi and Aunt Lori each brought her 20+ books from the library. We guessed that she should be in books aimed at 1rst graders. As each load of books came in, she sat down and spent a couple of hours reading through them all. Having conquered those, she started pulling full length chapter books off of the book shelves to read. Instead of short books, she prefers to read the Little House on the Prairie series, Too Much Salt and Pepper, the American Girl books, or whatever book I'm reading.
I do have to wonder just what she will be reading when she starts 1rst grade in 2.5 years.
P.S. I asked Elise to read this blog out loud to me and the only words she didn't know were doting, ability, conquered, length, and 1rst.
I just have to glow a bit about my little reader, Elise. At 4 years old, she continues to amaze and startle us with her ability. During this last vacation to Portland, Grammi and Aunt Lori each brought her 20+ books from the library. We guessed that she should be in books aimed at 1rst graders. As each load of books came in, she sat down and spent a couple of hours reading through them all. Having conquered those, she started pulling full length chapter books off of the book shelves to read. Instead of short books, she prefers to read the Little House on the Prairie series, Too Much Salt and Pepper, the American Girl books, or whatever book I'm reading.
I do have to wonder just what she will be reading when she starts 1rst grade in 2.5 years.
P.S. I asked Elise to read this blog out loud to me and the only words she didn't know were doting, ability, conquered, length, and 1rst.
Monday, January 4, 2010
Christmas in Pictures
Wyatt with his new quilt, made by Aunt Summer and Kay Kay.
Cousins Wyatt and Rose.
Proud Uncle Jeffrey with our first niece, Rose.
Elise and Zion sporting their Christmas pajamas.
Me, the kids, and my Grandpa Tom.
Decorating Christmas cookies.
Family of 5!
Our new minivan and car topper ready for the drive to McMinnville, TN.
Daddy and son catching some sleep.
I made a box house for the kids. They played in it for days. Sometimes the box really is more fun than the contents.
Go Vikings!
Our little glow-worm.
Zion snuggling on his new snake quilt.
Elise with her new butterfly quilt.
Sweet santa.
Our first niece, Rose.
Flyin Zion
Kay Kay with her newest grandbabies.
Uncle Dave, Aunt Summer, and the kids all wearing jumpers that Summer made for them.
Family picture
My favorite spot for celebrating Christmas - Grandma Ruth and Grandpa Tom's home in Tennessee.Monday, December 14, 2009
His First Smile
His First Smile
yesterday I was the caretaker
provider of milk
dirty diaper changer
and little stomach burper
yesterday his face was indifferent
cranky or sad
eyes open to see and take in
but not to give back
but then he smiled
I happened to pass by his way
he upset, in tears
when he turned to look at me
to see me
to know me
his crying ceased
and he smiled
at me
knowing me
wanting me
loving me
so today I know
that when it comes to love
he might be my littlest
but I am his first
yesterday I was the caretaker
provider of milk
dirty diaper changer
and little stomach burper
yesterday his face was indifferent
cranky or sad
eyes open to see and take in
but not to give back
but then he smiled
I happened to pass by his way
he upset, in tears
when he turned to look at me
to see me
to know me
his crying ceased
and he smiled
at me
knowing me
wanting me
loving me
so today I know
that when it comes to love
he might be my littlest
but I am his first
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