Ups and Downs

Downs
- reaching my 4 week mark here, only to find myself more sad than happy because I have 4.5 more still yet to go.
- Jeffrey being sick, which meant the loss of even the tiny little bits of time that we normally get alone together.
- our insurance company sending us a letter denying coverage of my hospital stay
- more of the same - stuck in hospital, away from my family, my baby still in danger, etc. The list is short, but frankly I don't need anything new bad to make life hard right now.

Ups
- watching Zion play with Benson Hayton, and imagining him playing with his brother
- chatting with Sharlene Hayton, and eating her cooking =)
- Jeffrey staying at the hospital with me to work on a paper instead of working on it more efficiently at home. We barely even talked while he was here, but now days just having him close by sends the loneliness away.
- our insurance company approving coverage of my hospital stay, stating that the denial letter should never have been sent to us, and apologizing for their mistake.
- my parents visiting this weekend! The joy of anticipation before hand and fun company while they are here are enough to boost my spirits for many days.
- my hubby and kids arriving at the hospital very early yesterday morning after they dropped Sharlene and Benson off at the airport. The kids woke me up by climbing into my bed, clad in pjs for some snuggle time. A morning in pjs with just our little family was some of the best of normal life at home, but transported to the hospital. It was exactly what I needed.
- our new friends bringing Sabbath lunch to us at the hospital. It felt like a potluck, complete with green bean casserole, special-k loaf, and vege chicken. Again, a bit of normal life transported here cheers my soul.
- a better conversation with the neonatologist. The outcome for a 32 week baby is much, much better than the outcome that we discussed at 27.5 weeks when I arrived at the hospital and first spoke with the neonatologist.

Everyday has its ups and downs. But most importantly, everyday has passed so far with my baby still safe in me. And so I will endure more downs, and search for more ups until he is ready to be born.